Rough Drafts

The older we get the more ex boyfriends we have and the more new girlfriends they get. Let's face it...they're your ex for a reason...but I'll be damned if the next girl is prettier, more successfull or god forbid skinnier than me! My ex-husband and I had created a list of places we wanted to go together and thanks to his "I'm going to put you dead last on my list of important things in life" mentality...we never went...to any of them. I wasn't asking to go to Fiji...just New York effing city...and as luck would have it, the first time I have to send him an e-mail through facebook (which in itself is a disastrous pit of jealousy and misconception!)right there...in big cheesey smile photos...my ex and his new, skinny girlfriend..at the Empire State Building. Thanks for that. Ass. PUFF.
The point is, why is it that we feel like it's a personal vendetta against us when they move on...even if we're the one that ended it?! Here's my theory. It's like we're the rough draft. Guys can push our buttons,test our boundaries and see how many times they can completely forget something important we've said until we finally toss in the towel, or vice versa. And this is when the real frustration begins.PUFF.
In essence you've molded them into what a perfect (or not so unbearable) guy should be...but not only is it too late for you to reap the benefits, but some other chick gets to benefit, allllll while thinking, "His ex-girlfriend must have been crazy to let him go!" Double Effing Puff.
The worst of all scenarios is when you actually know the new girlfriend/wife/baby mama...whatever she is. You know her...maybe you've even hung out alll together. You.Your ex. Her. Her ex. Did they have chemistry then? What am I, an oblivious blob of chopped liver! This kills me! Out of the bajillion people on this earth...you pick her. Again, thanks for that. Asses.
Then there's the ex who was SO against marriage that he proclaimed in front of you and alllll of your friends,"Marriage is not for me..." thus making you feel like the biggest piece of dog poo on the planet! But you...you have to laugh it off, like "Ohhh you're so funny! He's kidding..he's uhh kidding.." And then not one little year after you break up he's engaged to some patchouli wearing, lesbaru driving art teacher who hardly knows or appreciates the effort you put into creating the guy he is to her. Puff. Puff. Puff.
Unfortunately in my vast aray of friends from state to state...this is a common misfortune. So I say to myself, and to you, you fantastic girlfriends of mine. Screw being a rough draft. De-puff.